A collection of words that define us as women
together
By Ellen-Rae Cachola, Annie Fukushima, Lina
Hoshino, Eriko Ikehara, Maikiko James, Gwyn Kirk, Deborah Lee,
Colleen Tani Nakamoto, Sabina Perez, Taeva Shefler, Aileen Suzara,
and Sandra Schwartz.
Cavity
Body Cavity hollow festering wound scales crack rupture skin when it is left
alone with no recognition, acknowledgement, or thoughts. Cavern of longing, of
sorrow, the silent roar of loss + possibility. Possibility of what? Healing?
How does one begin to repair the things we have perhaps helped torn apart but
this cavity brings ancient memories to the surface. Cavity healed and healing,
gaping and yet full of potential for change. With enough care and awareness,
we can acknowledge the spaces within ourselves.
Cellular
Plants, muscle, mind... And memory through living tissues
that aches, feels, evolves, and changes. Cellular is the
smallest yet busy level where we begin – and end,
in decomposition we become cellular again. Sometimes I
wonder if the makeup of the cellular is like karma, and
your cell memory is what creates your next move. Each cell,
a mind of its’ own, propels us forward, life in a
microscopic drop. Its’ drive carries us to have cellular
integrity.
Desire
I hold the pomegranate above the light and warmth of the
flame, wanting to bring to life my many seeds. Some are
named, some are faint glimmers, fragments of thoughts and
ideas. Each waiting to reveal the secrets of harmony, to
understand the path of natural flows. Each is a ruby red
teardrop with the potential of life, a tight kernel encased
within unknown boundaries. To indulge one or many and spit
out hard centers – spitting: fulfilling a desire
to thrust something into the world. And ideally, a seed
would grow. Deep desire for things growing, deep desire
for roots and fertile earth not destroyed. Erosion only
the remnants of untouched desires, breaking, waiting… waiting…
Dreams
I dream with my eyes open. Sometimes, when I look out there
is an unclarity. But I’m walking tiredly floating
underneath the ground of my own shadow, my ancestors footsteps
I hear with my body, it beckons me to utter in the language
of my dreams, bearing truths to a world that needs to embrace
the language of dreams. A world that remembers the pains
and sufferings, the triumphs and the ancient despair. Dreams
are an umbilical cord to that world that has been and could
be. How do we react to our dreams? How do we choose between
our hopes and our lived realities and enable our dreams
to become that reality.
Ego
What is the ego? How does one know and set its boundaries?
It drives us to action and allows us to get what we need… it’s
also good to step back, sometimes, observe, and really listen.
Ego is still present and I take the thumb of my femininity
and squash it like a bug. Ego is there like a schizophrenic
wanderer asking questions how the world has produced it. When
it was a child, it didn’t recognize itself, its’ nature,
habits, power. I met it for the first time when I bloomed under
affirmation. When I felt inspired into action, into the great
loving No! (Yes!). When I was silenced by fear, blame, self
doubt – the heavy hand of other. Where lies the balance?
Embody
To embody is to inhabit.
My body is where I inhabit,
Or does my body inhabit me?
Where do I and my body begin and end?
Are we not one and the same, though sometimes
We live apart?
That Nan Han has said once the spirit form exists
Before the body and our body is a smaller part
Of our existence, being.
What we see in the mirror is only skin deep, that the world sees. But the world
can only know the part of your spirit that sings through your eyes, your skin,
your actions that enable an embodiment. To embody is to live and receive, and
let go. Reflecting experience of the world and revealing what it has created
and allowed to survive… Different openings are what we embody.
Exhaustion
The world is exhausted. Take deep breaths.
Too much going on, not enough breathing
Wake up time – or reenergize
Maybe this would help us to move forward at last.
It’s been a long eight years
It’s been a long millennium.
It’s been a long step, a long breath, a long thought,
yet we taken another step, another breath, another try.
Sitting in the stillness of exhaustion – is it a good
tired or a bad tired? What do we hear in the exhaustion?
What do we learn?
Time to renew the spirit, to be in touch with what brings
joy; lying beneath the stars and taking in the universe… Winds
change direction often, knowing and being detached.
Exhaustion is frightening when you don’t know why.
Hands
Hands build
Creating,
Shaping…
Providing
care and helping others
Holding up and molding… Building structure/healing,
hands cleaning, hands washing and squeezing
Creating large changes with small muscles – the tools
with which we work everyday without noticing. The delicacy
of fingers, intricacy – attention to detail in our
work, especially created by our hands. Also taken for granted,
but without hands we find other ways to create and to express
because it is necessary that we see the value in our hands,
but the value to all the parts it is connected to.
Healing
Healing has so many levels and many
of them are invisible except to the body. I know that in
this moment, my body is remembering. Remembering that things
are moving, layers, overlap. Onion skins make me want to stay
still – I don’t want to cry, but keep it frozen,
please don’t laugh or judge, just be here with me as
I shake and cry, dance and shout, move into a union of self
that unveils the beauty of being a woman where roots go far… in
rooted remembering I am healing. Inside the healing is both
warn and carries its’ own kind of pain that I return
to knowing that in healing I am always ever more connected
to the yous that sustain me.
Hugs
Comforting touches soothing rest stops in deep recesses of
my soul in need of support warm, strong, self-loving, hugs
keep me warm throughout the day. I need to think of you
like a sweater even though you are far away. How long did
I have you? Before we were born. Our time together here
is not the first time, not the second time, for we are
both of time and not bound by it. Hugs enable our acts
to continue on, in the darkness and in the memory of our
connection of our choice to reach toward the other. A moment
of recognizing we are human beings despite the distance
or the time we are apart.
Intersection
Entering into a space of multiple realities, one is turned
here, there beyond, and within. One tunes in to hope of
listening deeply and hearing the promise of shadows that
reveal the facets of things that combine rough with soft,
the unseen with the visible. There are things named and
unnamed here that draw their power from their intersection
of energies and bodies and ideas. It is here in the space
between, the space within, we find ourselves at vulnerable
crossroads – often afraid to make the journey over.
Then someone waves from across the street, or turns the
corner and places a hand on our shoulder, and the intersection
becomes less daunting. The path becomes a crossroad of
possibilities.
Things
How much, how little, does it take?
What is the cost of things?
Does a thing imply value or does value imply things?
Some things I loathe, some things I need, some things I love,
some things I seek.
What if we lived in an economy not based on things – not
based on buying and selling things –
Be-ings not th-ings
This is what capitalism brings – (Marx) (the invention
of capitalism) dehumanization where people are objectified
as sources of labor from which the capitalists extract greater
wealth for their gain. Where do we draw the line of being
sucked into a system that is motivated by profit and not
people’s welfare. Things we need – health, education,
livable wages, a community to share, food, clean air and
water. This makes me feel secure and enriched as a woman,
a daughter, a friend. I can turn things into what I believe.
Understanding
Understanding comes from listening to what somebody or something
is saying, and then listening to yourself and your response
to that. Understanding is an exercise in empathy and healing,
but without imposing cures. It’s really difficult to
understand many things so perhaps it’s best to pick
a few things and focus on what is really necessary. Sometimes,
understanding is all we really need, a greatest gift to ourselves
and others, and yet so hard to do – to understand another
when it’s hard to even understand oneself. How circumstance
impacts others, being present and
Woman
Body in human form, fragile, vulnerable, honest, yearning,
tell us what you have to say about your experience in life
dealing with the powers that oppress and lessen your capacities
to become. To see your true spirit you must take the time to
explore and reach out to those who voices and practice reflect
your need to be in the present. Women’s bodies as places
of strength and empowerment – speak to me everyday. Her
bodies are embodied in my ancestors, my body, my past, my histories
like beads worn on the neck. Family heirlooms passed down through
generations… Sometimes they are tarnished pearls. Forgotten
bodies of those women who have been known for their bodies,
not for their precious memories, histories, and precious lives
are remembered in our work, lives, and resistance.
Womankind
“Un mundo para los mujeres”: A world for women
in which women are given respect and can play a role to bring
peace and share solidarity within ourselves, each other… but
my sense of fear is that we as women will not always recognize
common ground amongst ourselves. Womankind must be open to
all beings (even men) because it is from mutual respect and
understanding where we will be able to listen and engage.
Women, some women, many women, are very good listeners – that’s
why we always want to talk. Talking should never be underestimated,
and as women we must value our ears and hearts to be connected.
We grow and reach out in order to live, to know who we are,
to learn and to love. What we’re really good at is
an unending list that ties us together as womankind.
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